- Getting urine out of a mattress is a rubbish way to spend your Sunday morning. Soap, water, a hairdryer and Febreze, if you're wondering.
- Having a song dedicated to you on the radio while you're scrubbing a mattress doesn't half cheer you up. Even if the song is Paul Nicholas singing Lady In Red*
*I never asked for it, for God's sake! What do you take me for?
- The best way to make a four-year-old stop being naughty is removal of pudding privileges.
- The best way to make a 14-year-old with Prader-Willi Syndrome stop being naughty is to take her home from Nanna's for half an hour just when her baby cousin is due round, and only take her back when she promises to be good. Food privileges, of course, cannot be tampered with for any reason. You simply cannot use threats of removal of food as a punishment for someone who is constantly hungry. It's just too cruel. Besides that, you'd never hear the bloody end of it.
- Deciding not to send Christmas cards and making a silly video instead is fun.
Video is my own Christmas Message 2012. The music is Rolf Harris and Rick Parfitt - Christmas In The Sun. The man responsible for making me aware of its existence is the legendary @Beany_. He was the same chap who dedicated the aforementioned Paul Nicholas song to me on the Charity Shop Classics internet radio show today. But I'm trying not to hold that against him.